Measure for Measure — Act 3, Scene 2 · Shakespeare for Bharat

ELBOW

Nay, if there be no remedy for it, but that you willneeds buy and sell men and women like beasts, weshall have all the world drink brown and white bastard.

DUKE VINCENTIO

O heavens! what stuff is here

POMPEY

'Twas never merry world since, of two usuries, themerriest was put down, and the worser allowed byorder of law a furred gown to keep him warm; andfurred with fox and lamb-skins too, to signify, thatcraft, being richer than innocency, stands for the facing.

ELBOW

Come your way, sir. 'Bless you, good father friar.

DUKE VINCENTIO

And you, good brother father. What offence haththis man made you, sir?

ELBOW

Marry, sir, he hath offended the law: and, sir, wetake him to be a thief too, sir; for we have foundupon him, sir, a strange picklock, which we havesent to the deputy.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Fie, sirrah! a bawd, a wicked bawd!The evil that thou causest to be done,That is thy means to live. Do thou but thinkWhat 'tis to cram a maw or clothe a backFrom such a filthy vice: say to thyself,From their abominable and beastly touchesI drink, I eat, array myself, and live.Canst thou believe thy living is a life,So stinkingly depending? Go mend, go mend.

POMPEY

Indeed, it does stink in some sort, sir; but yet,sir, I would prove--

DUKE VINCENTIO

Nay, if the devil have given thee proofs for sin,Thou wilt prove his. Take him to prison, officer:Correction and instruction must both workEre this rude beast will profit.

ELBOW

He must before the deputy, sir; he has given himwarning: the deputy cannot abide a whoremaster: ifhe be a whoremonger, and comes before him, he wereas good go a mile on his errand.

DUKE VINCENTIO

That we were all, as some would seem to be,From our faults, as faults from seeming, free!

ELBOW

His neck will come to your waist,--a cord, sir.

POMPEY

I spy comfort; I cry bail. Here's a gentleman and afriend of mine.

LUCIO

How now, noble Pompey! What, at the wheels ofCaesar? art thou led in triumph? What, is therenone of Pygmalion's images, newly made woman, to behad now, for putting the hand in the pocket andextracting it clutch'd? What reply, ha? Whatsayest thou to this tune, matter and method? Is'tnot drowned i' the last rain, ha? What sayestthou, Trot? Is the world as it was, man? Which isthe way? Is it sad, and few words? or how? Thetrick of it?

DUKE VINCENTIO

Still thus, and thus; still worse!

LUCIO

How doth my dear morsel, thy mistress? Procures shestill, ha?

POMPEY

Troth, sir, she hath eaten up all her beef, and sheis herself in the tub.

LUCIO

Why, 'tis good; it is the right of it; it must beso: ever your fresh whore and your powdered bawd:an unshunned consequence; it must be so. Art goingto prison, Pompey?

POMPEY

Yes, faith, sir.

LUCIO

Why, 'tis not amiss, Pompey. Farewell: go, say Isent thee thither. For debt, Pompey? or how?

ELBOW

For being a bawd, for being a bawd.

LUCIO

Well, then, imprison him: if imprisonment be thedue of a bawd, why, 'tis his right: bawd is hedoubtless, and of antiquity too; bawd-born.Farewell, good Pompey. Commend me to the prison,Pompey: you will turn good husband now, Pompey; youwill keep the house.

POMPEY

I hope, sir, your good worship will be my bail.

LUCIO

No, indeed, will I not, Pompey; it is not the wear.I will pray, Pompey, to increase your bondage: Ifyou take it not patiently, why, your mettle is themore. Adieu, trusty Pompey. 'Bless you, friar.

DUKE VINCENTIO

And you.

LUCIO

Does Bridget paint still, Pompey, ha?

ELBOW

Come your ways, sir; come.

POMPEY

You will not bail me, then, sir?

LUCIO

Then, Pompey, nor now. What news abroad, friar?what news?

ELBOW

Come your ways, sir; come.

LUCIO

Go to kennel, Pompey; go.

LUCIO

What news, friar, of the duke?

DUKE VINCENTIO

I know none. Can you tell me of any?

LUCIO

Some say he is with the Emperor of Russia; othersome, he is in Rome: but where is he, think you?

DUKE VINCENTIO

I know not where; but wheresoever, I wish him well.

LUCIO

It was a mad fantastical trick of him to steal fromthe state, and usurp the beggary he was never bornto. Lord Angelo dukes it well in his absence; heputs transgression to 't.

DUKE VINCENTIO

He does well in 't.

LUCIO

A little more lenity to lechery would do no harm inhim: something too crabbed that way, friar.

DUKE VINCENTIO

It is too general a vice, and severity must cure it.

LUCIO

Yes, in good sooth, the vice is of a great kindred;it is well allied: but it is impossible to extirpit quite, friar, till eating and drinking be putdown. They say this Angelo was not made by man andwoman after this downright way of creation: is ittrue, think you?

DUKE VINCENTIO

How should he be made, then?

LUCIO

Some report a sea-maid spawned him; some, that hewas begot between two stock-fishes. But it iscertain that when he makes water his urine iscongealed ice; that I know to be true: and he is amotion generative; that's infallible.

DUKE VINCENTIO

You are pleasant, sir, and speak apace.

LUCIO

Why, what a ruthless thing is this in him, for therebellion of a codpiece to take away the life of aman! Would the duke that is absent have done this?Ere he would have hanged a man for the getting ahundred bastards, he would have paid for the nursinga thousand: he had some feeling of the sport: heknew the service, and that instructed him to mercy.

DUKE VINCENTIO

I never heard the absent duke much detected forwomen; he was not inclined that way.

LUCIO

O, sir, you are deceived.

DUKE VINCENTIO

'Tis not possible.

LUCIO

Who, not the duke? yes, your beggar of fifty; andhis use was to put a ducat in her clack-dish: theduke had crotchets in him. He would be drunk too;that let me inform you.

DUKE VINCENTIO

You do him wrong, surely.

LUCIO

Sir, I was an inward of his. A shy fellow was theduke: and I believe I know the cause of hiswithdrawing.

DUKE VINCENTIO

What, I prithee, might be the cause?

LUCIO

No, pardon; 'tis a secret must be locked within theteeth and the lips: but this I can let youunderstand, the greater file of the subject held theduke to be wise.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Wise! why, no question but he was.

LUCIO

A very superficial, ignorant, unweighing fellow.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Either this is the envy in you, folly, or mistaking:the very stream of his life and the business he hathhelmed must upon a warranted need give him a betterproclamation. Let him be but testimonied in his ownbringings-forth, and he shall appear to theenvious a scholar, a statesman and a soldier.Therefore you speak unskilfully: or if yourknowledge be more it is much darkened in your malice.

LUCIO

Sir, I know him, and I love him.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Love talks with better knowledge, and knowledge withdearer love.

LUCIO

Come, sir, I know what I know.

DUKE VINCENTIO

I can hardly believe that, since you know not whatyou speak. But, if ever the duke return, as ourprayers are he may, let me desire you to make youranswer before him. If it be honest you have spoke,you have courage to maintain it: I am bound to callupon you; and, I pray you, your name?

LUCIO

Sir, my name is Lucio; well known to the duke.

DUKE VINCENTIO

He shall know you better, sir, if I may live toreport you.

LUCIO

I fear you not.

DUKE VINCENTIO

O, you hope the duke will return no more; or youimagine me too unhurtful an opposite. But indeed Ican do you little harm; you'll forswear this again.

LUCIO

I'll be hanged first: thou art deceived in me,friar. But no more of this. Canst thou tell ifClaudio die to-morrow or no?

DUKE VINCENTIO

Why should he die, sir?

LUCIO

Why? For filling a bottle with a tundish. I wouldthe duke we talk of were returned again: theungenitured agent will unpeople the province withcontinency; sparrows must not build in hishouse-eaves, because they are lecherous. The dukeyet would have dark deeds darkly answered; he wouldnever bring them to light: would he were returned!Marry, this Claudio is condemned for untrussing.Farewell, good friar: I prithee, pray for me. Theduke, I say to thee again, would eat mutton onFridays. He's not past it yet, and I say to thee,he would mouth with a beggar, though she smelt brownbread and garlic: say that I said so. Farewell.

DUKE VINCENTIO

No might nor greatness in mortalityCan censure 'scape; back-wounding calumnyThe whitest virtue strikes. What king so strongCan tie the gall up in the slanderous tongue?But who comes here?

ESCALUS

Go; away with her to prison!

MISTRESS OVERDONE

Good my lord, be good to me; your honour is accounteda merciful man; good my lord.

ESCALUS

Double and treble admonition, and still forfeit inthe same kind! This would make mercy swear and playthe tyrant.

Provost

A bawd of eleven years' continuance, may it pleaseyour honour.

MISTRESS OVERDONE

My lord, this is one Lucio's information against me.Mistress Kate Keepdown was with child by him in theduke's time; he promised her marriage: his childis a year and a quarter old, come Philip and Jacob:I have kept it myself; and see how he goes about to abuse me!

ESCALUS

That fellow is a fellow of much licence: let him becalled before us. Away with her to prison! Go to;no more words.

ESCALUS

Provost, my brother Angelo will not be altered;Claudio must die to-morrow: let him be furnishedwith divines, and have all charitable preparation.if my brother wrought by my pity, it should not beso with him.

Provost

So please you, this friar hath been with him, andadvised him for the entertainment of death.

ESCALUS

Good even, good father.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Bliss and goodness on you!

ESCALUS

Of whence are you?

DUKE VINCENTIO

Not of this country, though my chance is nowTo use it for my time: I am a brotherOf gracious order, late come from the SeeIn special business from his holiness.

ESCALUS

What news abroad i' the world?

DUKE VINCENTIO

None, but that there is so great a fever ongoodness, that the dissolution of it must cure it:novelty is only in request; and it is as dangerousto be aged in any kind of course, as it is virtuousto be constant in any undertaking. There is scarcetruth enough alive to make societies secure; butsecurity enough to make fellowships accurst: muchupon this riddle runs the wisdom of the world. Thisnews is old enough, yet it is every day's news. Ipray you, sir, of what disposition was the duke?

ESCALUS

One that, above all other strifes, contendedespecially to know himself.

DUKE VINCENTIO

What pleasure was he given to?

ESCALUS

Rather rejoicing to see another merry, than merry atany thing which professed to make him rejoice: agentleman of all temperance. But leave we him tohis events, with a prayer they may prove prosperous;and let me desire to know how you find Claudioprepared. I am made to understand that you havelent him visitation.

DUKE VINCENTIO

He professes to have received no sinister measurefrom his judge, but most willingly humbles himselfto the determination of justice: yet had he framedto himself, by the instruction of his frailty, manydeceiving promises of life; which I by my goodleisure have discredited to him, and now is heresolved to die.

ESCALUS

You have paid the heavens your function, and theprisoner the very debt of your calling. I havelaboured for the poor gentleman to the extremestshore of my modesty: but my brother justice have Ifound so severe, that he hath forced me to tell himhe is indeed Justice.

DUKE VINCENTIO

If his own life answer the straitness of hisproceeding, it shall become him well; wherein if hechance to fail, he hath sentenced himself.

ESCALUS

I am going to visit the prisoner. Fare you well.

DUKE VINCENTIO

Peace be with you!

DUKE VINCENTIO

He who the sword of heaven will bearShould be as holy as severe;Pattern in himself to know,Grace to stand, and virtue go;More nor less to others payingThan by self-offences weighing.Shame to him whose cruel strikingKills for faults of his own liking!Twice treble shame on Angelo,To weed my vice and let his grow!O, what may man within him hide,Though angel on the outward side!How may likeness made in crimes,Making practise on the times,To draw with idle spiders' stringsMost ponderous and substantial things!Craft against vice I must apply:With Angelo to-night shall lieHis old betrothed but despised;So disguise shall, by the disguised,Pay with falsehood false exacting,And perform an old contracting.